I gave Michael B. Jordan the best 2 years of life and he does me like this?! We’ve been dating in my head for a few years now and I’m mad that his rumored girlfriend ain’t me. I know some are mad at him for other reasons, but I’m not going there with y’all today. It ain’t no time. What I do have time for is addressing this boycotting Black Panther nonsense. I feel like it’s fake news, but some of yall are crazy enough to make me believe that y’all really may do it. If you haven’t heard, word on the street is that my ex Michael B. Jordan is dating a woman who isn’t Black. GASP. So, in retaliation, (says the internet), Black women are boycotting the film we’ve all been waiting on since the creation of moving pictures– a BLACK SUPERHERO MOVIE.
Umm Mr. Internet, how self-sabotaging do you think we are? First of all internet, there are a host of other incredible Black people in the film; not to mention some amazingly fierce Black women like Angela, Lupita and Danai, who more than make this movie worth seeing. Even if we were petty enough to hold a grudge against my ex-bae. Why wouldn’t we support something so necessary for the uplifting of not only the culture, but our spirits as well? I haven’t been this excited about something for the culture since Beyoncé told us she was having twins. Best believe when I go see Black Panther, they gon mistake me for a citizen of Wakanda, chile! Shame on you internet for lying on us. Shame on any of you if you even considered boycotting. And shame on you Michael for leaving me high and dry. 😭
